This year will be a better one than the last.  It will. It must.  There are only improvements to be had… This I tell myself while sitting in a daze, remembering the friend I once had. I thought she would be here forever, I would run into her at random, I was sure I would see her again. I did, and we said good-bye in December. And on December 28, my friend Angela died of cancer.  I’m numb, lost in thought on what it all means.

What it means is that if there’s one promise we should try to keep it’s to tell the people we really love that they mean a lot to us. That someone shouldn’t be dying to get to see their friends and family. That life and relationships are precious and fragile, and we should do whatever it takes to maintain relationships.

And along with this, to play with my children as if I am a child, to do arts and crafts with unselfconscious abandon, and to smile more at everyone. Even strangers. Even the grumpy ones at the store or parking lot. Yes, I resolve to be open, loving, emotive, and annoyingly cheerful. I think we’ll call it “neighbourly”.

So that would be the content of my (shhhh) first  “new year’s resolution”. I hesitate to call it that as the tern usually implies that the future of the promise is in fact doomed.  BUT we shall see.

My second thing on the “list of lifestyle changes to try out in 2009″ (shhh… resolutions again!) is to reduce the amount of garbage, recycling and waste  for which I am directly responsible.  Such as soup cans, packaging, and shrinkwrapped meats.

Finally, I hope to expand my social world. I have been happiest when I have known many people, been friendly with multitudes. So I shall say “yes” to invitations, make efforts to be open and fearless (locate the resolve, in the promise of attempts at bravery).  At least, I’ll try to be.

Naturally there are other things I want to do, such as the elusive “Results” – accomplishments, something to show for my efforts. I’ve made a list (checked it twice), and set my success bar low at 10%. If I can get 10% of my listed hoped-for accomplishments done by next year, I will be really happy. 10% annual increases over the course of 5 years would make a significant impact.

Wish me luck and happy new year!